For the first time in a long time, people have been commenting that I seem calmer and happier. Even people who have no idea about our infertility struggle, and no idea that I’m doing this program. It makes me feel really happy to hear it, like I’m really achieving something. I’ve noticed I’ve been able to be ‘in the moment’ more with my friends and family as well, and really enjoy their company, which is great.
My husband even told me that I seem to be able to cope with things a lot better. I’m not ‘sweating the small stuff’ as much, and I’m focusing more on myself than worrying about what others are doing. It’s so nice to hear this from him, after all, he’s the one who knows me best.
It’s so easy to get trapped in the cycle of TTC, where it seems like nothing else matters. Slowly, the stress erodes your relationship with yourself, husband and friends. My relationship with my partner has suffered. Although we are always pretty good at being there for each other, and sticking together, we’ve been taking our stress and sadness out on each other rather than letting it bring us closer together. So, this week, it’s been a really nice to find positive things to do together, even just building a new little veggie patch together, and planting a fresh crop of beans, has been really enjoyable. Most of all, it’s been a nice way to take stock and appreciate each other again.
I’ve mentioned before that my partner has an insanely stressful job. I’ve been banging on about the things I’m learning in the Mind Body Program for some time now; he’s slowly beginning to listen (haha!). This week, we’ve been talking more about how we can get happiness back into our lives and I’ve been sharing the things I’m learning. Funnily enough, he’s even started researching some of the mindfulness techniques I’ve learned, and is testing them out for himself. He is looking forward to couples yoga next week, it’s another activity that we can do together to reconnect and practice being in the moment.
It’s nice to realise that TTC is not everything there is SO much else in our lives that we’re thankful for, and by focusing on those things, we can find happiness again, despite this infertility stuff!